Columbus Day

Driving is fun. We have to yell, yell out everything we see, the trains and the stop signs and the COLOR OF THE DUMPSTERS. A BLUE ONE MAMA and I cannot hear the radio. There are taxis and white vans and some stores we like, mattress stores for some reason and green means go, time to go, come on let's go.

Today is perfect, it is October but it is warm, leaves blowing across the streets and the trees have turned to that yellow gold Chicago color that combined with black branches means cold is coming, it is on its way.

We are headed to the woods, the forest preserves, with all the boys, one friend and Grandma. We have no plan except to walk around in the leaves and breathe, it is a good plan, we all just want some sun and a little time away from tv and the loudness of our house with what, like a hundred families in it. Let's walk and breathe. God it feels good.

Jude is out and down the hill before we can stop him so we follow, he is on his way to the river, or the piddly branch of it that runs through these woods. We walk run past dogs, people on bikes and what looks like a wedding reception on our way to the trees that guard the murky water. We know now that there will be no wildlife because Jude is crashing through the leaves like a big hungover moose so everything with even a little sense of self preservation will be long gone by the time we reach the treeline.

Sage is doing his best to keep up, I am watching him from the corner of my eye, worried about his ankles but pleased he is here, not at home playing Halo. His hair shines golden in the sun, and I realize with a shock that he is handsome, not just cute, and he is a teenager, not a child. Don helps Grandma over some tree roots and we are there, at the water, the mighty Chicago river, and there is a lawn chair and some beer cans. This is so, us, this trip, all this hoopla and chaos to get to some place that is somewhat less than epic but we are okay with that and pick up rocks and stuff to throw in the river.

Eden and Matthew are just on the edge, and I yell at them to step back and they start climbing a tree. There is a smell and I spend a few minutes contemplating calling the state troopers or the Doe Network but Don catches my eye and shakes his head. "Raccoon." God we are so married.

On the way home we get ice cream, and Jude is quiet now, with his head against the window, watching the world zip by, the world that fills him with wonder and fear and makes not so much sense to him but he is going to see it anyway, this beautiful boy, on this beautiful day, and there are leaves in my hair and mud on my shoes but we are good, all good, just for today, this moment, we are good.