Saturday, May 28, 2011

Date Night

We have a respite care worker now, which means we have Gretchan, our friend's daughter, to come and watch the kids while we go on a date. Four hours to do what we want. Go out to eat. See a movie. Drink coffee. Heaven.

We head out to Heartland Cafe, a favorite haunt in our younger days, we haven't been there in years, we used to go there when we had no money and linger over two cups of community coffee for hours and watch the hippies come and go. Now we have a little more money, and we get dinner. which is too rich for my post surgical stomach, so I do the accidental bulimic thing in the ladies. I come out with red eyes and smile at Don, and he winks at me. Romantic, in a Hill family sort of way.

We get in the car and start driving, unsure of where to go or what to do. We drive out to Northerly Island, look at the water, turn around and drive back. We get cups of coffee and wander around in a Walgreens, looking at stuff, holding hands. We realize that we are, once again, being followed by the store security. Honestly, if we were planning a life of crime, would we look like this? Wouldn't we try to like, blend?

We get back in the car and Don drives through the foggy spring night, and I curl up in the seat and doze, in and out, feeling like I am driving at night with my parents, safe, knowing that it is all taken care of. A song that sounds like a lullaby plays on the radio. It is nice to let it go, the vigilance that rules me, keeps me on my toes and makes it impossible to relax and be with my husband, my lover, my friend, just be. I can feel it washing over me like the fog, and flying away.

When we get home the boys are sleeping, except for Sage, who is watching a movie about Zombies, and
 Gretchan wants to know what we did, and I hesitate, what do I say, I threw up at a vegetarian cafe and we went to Walgreens and drove around? I just tell her that we enjoyed being together, just the two of us, and this is true, and she says goodnight. I sit down on the couch and Jude comes in, sleepy, and lays his head in my lap, and I smile at my husband, my lover, my friend, and think that life is good, very good, and he smiles back, and I lean back and close my eyes and let it all wash over me, and it is perfect in a way that I forgot it could be. Just tonight, we can rest, and know that we are beautiful, and it is good.


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